* star
Battle: Los Angeles is a mind-numbing experience, one so full of ineptitude and incoherent action that it literally traps itself within itself. Aliens have invaded earth and it's up to a group of Marines to save the day. From what exactly, the absolute destruction of a city? Downtown L.A is already in ruins quite early in the film's storyline, yet we think a group of marines in Santa Monica has all the answers? Battle: Los Angeles becomes so compiled with trash that I started to wonder if there was anyone left on the planet fighting against these creatures besides the group we are forced to focus on.
Aaron Eckhart was born to play this kind of role. It's too bad the script lets him down. His character, Marine Staff Sergeant Michael Nantz, has just retired. BUT THEN, HE IS FORCED TO GO BACK TO WORK TO FIGHT OFF ALIEN INVADERS! AH! Sorry for the corny explanation. But that's what Battle: Los Angeles entails: corny explanations followed by moments of loud explosions. Repeat this concept a dozen times and you got yourself a certifiable March madness movie that's sure to open above $30 million. Luckily for the film and the financiers behind it, they banked on the stupidity of the American public.
I almost feel jealous for Michael Nantz, because he had the opportunity to both retire and then come back to be the hero of heroes. In the real world, you're lucky if you can just retire. But enough banter of the film's relativity towards modern society, because that's certainly not what the intent of the film is. If anyone knows what the real intent is, let me know and I will credit you of your findings in this review.
I'm all for alien invasion movies. All I ask from the aliens is a reason for the attack and all I want from the humans is for them to be smart enough to be able to detect the millions of falling spaceships crashing to earth that apparently satellites can't pick up. Sure, they think they're just meteors at first. But even if that were the case, why would people take that news so nonchalantly? Meteors can be just as if not more dangerous than the actual aliens, so why does it have to be another race that we are so scared of?
Actually, I wouldn't even call these aliens a race. They look like leftover junk parts from movies like I, Robot, Independence Day, District 9, and every other alien/robot invasion movie ever made. I have mentioned before that my big complaint about Hollywood right now is their lack of timing in releasing event movies. Everything is either in the summer or holiday season. So while I was excited to see what could have been a fun blockbuster in March, Battle: Los Angeles drops the storytelling bar even lower than what it already was. Thus, Hollywood deserves to be in the slump that it's in.
March 2011 has given us Battle: Los Angeles, Sucker Punch, and the election of Chris Dodd as the chief lobbyist for the Motion Picture Association of America. April 2011 has Fast Five scheduled as its biggest movie premiere. The hope that a great movie which will save the industry seems to be scheduled far away into the distant future. Hopefully in that time, it will not include a Battle: Los Angeles sequel named after another city.
Aaron Eckhart was born to play this kind of role. It's too bad the script lets him down. His character, Marine Staff Sergeant Michael Nantz, has just retired. BUT THEN, HE IS FORCED TO GO BACK TO WORK TO FIGHT OFF ALIEN INVADERS! AH! Sorry for the corny explanation. But that's what Battle: Los Angeles entails: corny explanations followed by moments of loud explosions. Repeat this concept a dozen times and you got yourself a certifiable March madness movie that's sure to open above $30 million. Luckily for the film and the financiers behind it, they banked on the stupidity of the American public.
I almost feel jealous for Michael Nantz, because he had the opportunity to both retire and then come back to be the hero of heroes. In the real world, you're lucky if you can just retire. But enough banter of the film's relativity towards modern society, because that's certainly not what the intent of the film is. If anyone knows what the real intent is, let me know and I will credit you of your findings in this review.
I'm all for alien invasion movies. All I ask from the aliens is a reason for the attack and all I want from the humans is for them to be smart enough to be able to detect the millions of falling spaceships crashing to earth that apparently satellites can't pick up. Sure, they think they're just meteors at first. But even if that were the case, why would people take that news so nonchalantly? Meteors can be just as if not more dangerous than the actual aliens, so why does it have to be another race that we are so scared of?
Actually, I wouldn't even call these aliens a race. They look like leftover junk parts from movies like I, Robot, Independence Day, District 9, and every other alien/robot invasion movie ever made. I have mentioned before that my big complaint about Hollywood right now is their lack of timing in releasing event movies. Everything is either in the summer or holiday season. So while I was excited to see what could have been a fun blockbuster in March, Battle: Los Angeles drops the storytelling bar even lower than what it already was. Thus, Hollywood deserves to be in the slump that it's in.
March 2011 has given us Battle: Los Angeles, Sucker Punch, and the election of Chris Dodd as the chief lobbyist for the Motion Picture Association of America. April 2011 has Fast Five scheduled as its biggest movie premiere. The hope that a great movie which will save the industry seems to be scheduled far away into the distant future. Hopefully in that time, it will not include a Battle: Los Angeles sequel named after another city.
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